First Aid for Dealing With Stress, Panic, Fear, and Anxiety
Immediate stress relief - Learn to calm down when under intense stress. Breathing exercises and general guidelines.
Fear has plagued me all my life. Fear of bullying when I was a kid. Fear of not being good enough and never making it in this world as a young adult. Fear of rejection in matters of love and work or business. Fear of social interactions, being an introvert with a hint of social anxiety. Fear of pain and the sickness that has followed my disease for most of my life. But the most dominant fear in this later part of my life has been the fear of poverty, of losing money, of getting dragged down into the abyss of negative cash flows, from which I will never be able to swim back out again.
So I know fear, and I know anxiety - intimately. They’ve been my companions for most of my life. I’ve had to claw my way out of the darkest corners of my mind more times than I can count. I’ve been battling my demons for as long as I can remember. I’ve had to face my fears, work through my anxiety and retrain my mind repeatedly on numerous issues. Admittedly with varied success, but I have learned a lot during this time.
In this article, I want to share some of the techniques that have helped me the most, challenge you to try different perspectives, and see if they make you feel better. We are all different underneath. Experiment and find out what works for you.
“First aid” for dealing with stress then, when you find yourself in the gutter and bullets are flying over your head (fictitious or literal).
I am assuming that you are right now in the middle of a stressful situation. Perhaps a panic attack, a roaring anxiety, or maybe you’re being consumed with fear. Whatever you are dealing with, you’re in the gutter at this moment and crave at least a moment of relief.
What can you do right now to make yourself feel better?
In the near term, that is all you can do: find a way to make yourself feel better, clear your head, and start thinking about what to do about your specific situation.
I’m sure you know that our minds and bodies are reciprocally connected. Your mind always influences your body, and your body can influence the state of your mind.
Panic, fear, and anxiety are manifested in the body, among other symptoms, as:
Short, shallow breaths, sometimes even difficulty in breathing.
Breathing in the upper part of your lungs.
Hunched upper body.
Clenched muscles, tightness in your body.
Heavy pressure in your chest.
The easiest way to release some of that stress in the heat of the moment is to start with the body side of the equation. It also works the fastest and is easiest to learn and practice. It is always achievable and at your disposal, no matter the situation you find yourself in.
Your breathing influences how you feel more than anything else outside your mind.
Ask yourself, how am I breathing at this moment? And then take control of your breathing. If you’re in a stressful situation, you will find that you are breathing short, fast, shallow breaths. Some may even hold their breath for no reason (as I do). So the first thing you should always do is:
Straighten up, stand up, and open up your chest.
Take a few slow, deep breaths. If it helps, count as you do.
Shake your hands and legs to release the built-up energy.
Lift your hands above your head as you breathe in, fully expand your lounges, and drop them down as you exhale, actively involving your body in breathing.
Breathe mindfully. Focus on breathing and forget everything else when you do this (like with meditation).
Here are some essential breathing techniques you must learn and practice as often as possible if you wish to improve how you feel and alleviate your fear or anxiety in the moment.
4444 breathing technique
Breathe in slowly for 4 seconds (or counts).
Hold for 4 seconds.
Exhale for 4 seconds.
Hold the empty lungs for 4 seconds.
Repeat the four steps over and over again until you calm down. Yes, it’s that simple. Don’t overthink it.
When you practice these breathing techniques, make sure to breathe into your belly with the help of your diaphragm. If you are practicing breathing, you should do it right.
478 breathing technique
This is my favorite breathing technique for calming anxiety and releasing stress.
Breathe in slowly for 4 seconds (or counts).
Hold full lungs for 7 seconds.
Exhale completely for 8 seconds.
Repeat for as long as you like. Breathe in through the nose, exhale through the mouth, and purse your lips to limit air outflow. If you can muster a “sound” as you exhale, it might help even further.
I sometimes do this exercise for an extended period of time (up to 30 minutes) and prolong the holding and exhaling parts for maximum effect. You might feel lightheaded after a while, but that is a good thing for releasing stress. Just don’t do it while driving, or at least limit the holds of each step to prevent getting lightheaded. This exercise is perfect as a daily ritual in the morning, evening, or just when you need a little break. I know it sounds too simple, but it works wonders!
Acceptance - you must accept where you are and what is happening.
Accept that you are feeling the way you are feeling. Don’t be afraid of letting those “bad” feelings come and take over you. Allow the fear, stress, anxiety, sadness, and anger to play out fully. Don’t try to suppress them; you’ll only prolong the suffering. You have to allow your feelings to express themselves for you to get through the thing you need to get through. If you run away from them, they’ll just keep chasing you until you can’t run anymore.
The sooner you let it play out, the sooner you’ll be free from it. You don’t have to like it. In fact, you won’t like it, but it’s there, and there is no sense in pretending it isn’t. That just leads you down some darker paths in the end. You're fighting a losing battle if you try to replace them with some “feel good” positive thinking techniques. There is a time and a place for that, but it’s not in the middle of an intense negative feeling running over you.
The only way out is through!
Allow those emotions, whatever they are, to manifest themselves fully and just stay with them. Don’t try to suppress them, don’t try to override them, don’t pretend they’re not present. Be fully aware that you are experiencing those feelings, and they feel awful. Just observe them without judgment. Allow yourself just to feel them. Allow them to play out fully.
No storm lasts forever, and neither does any feeling, no matter how painful it feels at this moment. This too shall pass!
Accept that what is done is done. You can’t change the past. You can only accept it and learn from it. Yes, it sucks. It’s a dark place you’ve found yourself in. You don’t want to be there. I get it. You feel bad, and you just want it to stop. You’re losing your money, your job, your relationship, your health, whatever it is causing you this immense stress - it’s happening whether you like it or not. And it will happen how it will, whether you resist it or not.
First, acknowledge what is happening. Don’t you dare pretend it’s not! Own any mistake that you’ve made. Even if something is not your fault, it happened. Shit happens sometimes. Bad things happen to good people. It’s just the way of the world. You cannot have only the good in life and never experience the bad. Do not take things personally. They probably aren’t.
Forgive yourself for your mistakes.
If you caused this mess, make peace with yourself. You’re only human. We all make mistakes. Try to forgive yourself as soon as possible because no amount of self-hatred will help you.
A good way of thinking about this is that if you had known better - if you had known that this was going to be the consequence of your choices, you would have probably made better ones. If you had the information, knowledge, perspective, and experience that you have now, you would do better. But you didn’t, so there’s no point blaming yourself for this mistake.
All we can ever do is the best we know how to or simply can do, for whatever reason, at this moment.
Maybe you knew you should do something but simply couldn’t get yourself to do it. It doesn’t matter. At that moment, you did what you did. At that moment, you thought the way you thought. Of course, now you know better, but being a general is much easier after the battle. In the heat of the moment, we all make mistakes. You now know things that you didn’t know before. It’s ok. Let it go. Accept it. Forgive yourself and move on, as that is the only thing you can do now.
After you have found a way to make peace with the situation and yourself, you can now attempt to salvage what is possible.
You will now be able to think clearly and find the best solutions available to you.
In the following article of this series, we’ll be going a little deeper into the process of accepting the worst-case scenario, the source of your stress, and how to be at peace with it, so that you may rid yourself of this enormous stress you’re under and get back to living and operating at your best.
For now, just allow yourself to feel all that you are feeling, accept what has happened, and focus on first aid, breathing deeply, consciously, and making peace with the situation.
Sharing is caring, especially in the online digital world.
I like you. Subscribe, and I’ll deliver new stories to your mailbox. You can choose topics you’re interested in and will receive only those. I also write on other subjects, fiction, and non-fiction. Check out the map of my publications!
Thanks for reading and helping by liking, commenting, and sharing! It means a lot. Follow this LINK if you want to do more. You are appreciated.